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"Canada?" [28 Sep 2006|09:12am]

airbornbacon
[ mood | happy ]



EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

http://www.wrcj909fm.org/

Go to "Staff"


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[23 May 2006|02:55pm]

airbornbacon
[ mood | giggly ]

To quote my Dad handing me $600 in $100 bills---


"It's all about the Benjamins. .... what? I like to make sure all my 'peeps' are all set!"

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" Heros." [04 May 2006|02:55pm]

airbornbacon
[ mood | rushed ]

Dad: "The Vikings didn't see it as rape and pillage. They saw it as trade."

1 comment|post comment

Debbie! [10 Apr 2006|04:48pm]

airbornbacon
[ mood | amused ]

my dad: "it's not good to hit girls. .......



kill them so they can't rat on you."

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"George Washington! " [24 Jun 2005|11:02am]

airbornbacon
[ mood | amused ]

Dad: " I want to live long enough to see what kills you."

1 comment|post comment

[07 May 2005|07:38pm]

airbornbacon
[ mood | amused ]

Dad: "Ok, I have the best email spam blocker of all. With my spam blocker, I come to your house, and unplug your computer. BOOM! No more spam. I'm thinking about marketing it, what do you think?"

Me: "Amazing."



____________________________________________________________________

(Watching Iron Chef)

Dad: "I'm fighting with the BATTLE CRAB mark 7000! With side mounted rocket launchers and anti-aircraft missles! I shall be the most battle-y of the crabs!"

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"Pow." [29 Apr 2005|10:58pm]

airbornbacon
[ mood | bored ]

Found on my Big Gulp bottle this morning---Collapse )

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" yes looks like another high scoring season for the home team." [15 Apr 2005|01:33pm]

airbornbacon
[ mood | bored ]

My Dad and I are having a conversation ethched in dust on the TV.


Dad- "DUST."

Me- "Surely you jest."

Dad- "Well, yes I do. And don't call me Shirley."

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" Nog is better than Wesley in his sleep." [23 Feb 2005|11:59am]

airbornbacon
[ mood | devious ]

Dad: "So yeah, you like that new tea, and uh, I didn't strangle you at birth. So uh, it's a good day for you!"

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"So, see you in hell then?" [06 Jan 2005|01:09pm]

airbornbacon
[ mood | damned ]

My Dad: "Hey! The tsunami death toll is 139,000. I'll bet you it goes over 150,000."

Me: "Uh, are we beting money?"

My Dad: "No, no we're betting food and water. Food and water we could send to the tsunami victims."

Me: "Oh ok."

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" the corti-slim lifestyle!" [01 Jan 2005|06:37pm]

airbornbacon
[ mood | amused ]

mom: ok, so for our 25th wedding anniversery when we get re-married in disney world, will you be my maid of honor?

me: yeah, if you get re-married in disney world, i'll be happy to be your maid of honor.

dad: right, and to save money, you'll also have to be the best man.

2 comments|post comment

[30 Dec 2004|01:11pm]

airbornbacon
[ mood | accomplished ]

Woah, my Dad and I had like, the most productive day ever.

We taped up my window, and ate lunch.




Me (cleaning my room)
- Dad walks in holding a tire iron and hammer: "Hey when I kill your Mom, what do you think I hould use?"

*********************************
Dad: (while eating our lunch)- "What do you think god intended for perogis?"
**********************************
Dad: "How do you think they invented ham?"

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[21 Dec 2004|10:16am]

airbornbacon
[ mood | cold ]

me: "Have you gotten Mom anything yet?"

dad: "Nope."

me: "When you say she wanted fleece, do you mean like Old Navy preformance fleece?"

dad: "No! She wants sweats! Like sweat pants!"

me: " That's not fleece."

dad: "Why, did you buy fleece?"

me: "No but I looked at them."

dad: "Can you return it?"

me: "NO I JUST LOOKED."

dad: "Oh. Yeah she wants sweats."

me: "I didn't look at those."

dad: "Aw, don't worry, she'll be dead soon."


-- "patients taking naproxen had a 50 percent greater incidence of cardiovascular events "

---My Mom takes 2 pills every like three hours.


( http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/6739209/ )

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*** UPDATE FOR MR. GOGGIN *** [25 Nov 2004|02:41pm]

flyinpiggy18
[ mood | Apologetic ]

I am sincerely sorry for playing Halo 2 as my daughter Liz's character--I was going down a gravity lift and a brute was killing me, and I thought, "I'll just kill this one while she's in the shower--no one will know." He killed me first though, and I got mad, so I wiped him out on my next round--and then killed a couple of dozen grunts--killing...killing...killing...spilling their guts all over the corridors. Rivers of covenant blood flowed--and before I knew it, both groups of captive marines were freed and I was someplace else altogether. I am so sorry.

-Mr. Goggin

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[25 Nov 2004|02:14pm]

flyinpiggy18
[ mood | crushed ]

UGH.

The Dad is so on probation for no video game etiquette.



Me: what's that noise?

Mom: You were away too long.

Me: Is that MY game?

Dad: I'm sorry.

Me:(Disbelief) Is that MY game?

Dad: I just wanted to kill some brutes.

Me: Is that MY game?

Dad: ...Yes....

Me: You WHORE!

Dad: I'm sorry!! I didn't know how to change to Moron!

Me: IT'S NOT MY FAULT YOU'RE DENSE!! That was MY game! Did I ever ONCE play YOUR game while you took 7 years to get through the campaign? NO. I WAITED MY TURN. Do you know what time it is?

Dad: 2:15?

Me: WRONG. It's MY TURN time. Do you know what time it is?

Dad: Time for your turn?

Me: Close! Time for me to SHOVE YOUR HEAD IN THE SALTED CAVITY OF A TURKEY.



Ugh.

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" i think a little girl called." "... that was amy." [17 Oct 2004|08:38pm]

airbornbacon
[ mood | okay ]

i was making a list of phone numbers to put by the phone for easy access in case i ever need to call home again and make my mom look up a number.

my dad decided to help.


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v154/flyinpiggy18/dad.jpg

eat your heart out darcy, i have his number. apparently.

ALSO- lly if you read this what's your #?

10 comments|post comment

steak house [15 Oct 2004|09:59pm]

airbornbacon
[ mood | geeky ]

http://www.donshula.com/48ozmember.asp?MemberID=B9F309A5D6A334A885256F2A0053003C

3 comments|post comment

[15 Jun 2004|03:50pm]

flyinpiggy18
[ mood | amused ]

me: *spinning in a circle* "man i dunno why i wasn't a ballerina"

dad: "you took those classes. oh! because you were bad! it was cute when you were like 3, but you were pretty bad."

me: " i'm going to be sick!"

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that's the guy from braveheart! [07 May 2004|01:48pm]

flyinpiggy18
[ mood | chipper ]

mom: "and the lotto number has 19, and that's lucky because liz is 19."

dad: "... she is not!"

(awkward silence)

dad: "oh wait, maybe she is. how old am i?"

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oh jesus [07 Mar 2004|11:49pm]

flyinpiggy18
[ mood | amused ]

my dad: "take two oreos and call me in the morning" (waddle waddle away)

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